Only monogamy equals commitment?

One of the common misconceptions about nonmonogamous (including polyamorous) folk, is that they can't commit. If they really loved someone, they'd stop all this nonsense. If we were really committed to a relationship, we simply wouldn't have others. And, of course, you can't possibly be committed to more than one person at a time, right?... Continue Reading →

Gay, straight, bi… poly?

Some people describe being poly as an orientation, whereas others feel it is simply a matter of personal choice. To be perfectly honest, when the Poly Means Many bloggers chose this topic for November's posts, I hadn't really given the idea much thought. My first instinct was that I already have an orientation and I... Continue Reading →

I’ve been missing you

You might think that polyamory is amazing all of the time but, sadly, you'd be wrong. As with other types of relationship, there are bad times as well as good. As far as I'm concerned, the good times more than make up for the bad, but it would be remiss of me to never mention... Continue Reading →

Definitions of non-monogamy

Over the weekend, Hella Walkington blogged about monogamy, polygamy and polyamory. She asked me to write a little bit for it and, I have to say, I was a bit surprised by her inclusion of the word polygamy. I have never met anyone who would describe themselves as polygamous, and wasn't even sure what it... Continue Reading →

Friends, metamours and other non-lovers

There are many more people involved in a polyamorous set-up than you might think. Many people can view polyamory just in terms of the romantic and/or sexual relationships that you have - What, like, two girlfriends? - but it is actually so much more than that. Everyone focuses on their lovers, but what about the... Continue Reading →

Deciphering the panic

I have been thinking about polyamory for a while now. However, I don't mean in the context of my blog posts on the subject. I have been thinking of polyamory and what it means to me personally. For almost a year now, I have had one relationship. Last December I wrote about how I could... Continue Reading →

Relationships: Public vs private

Speaking openly about being in a non-traditional relationship is a tricky thing. On the one hand, I want other people to understand that, while it may not be for everyone, it works well for us and is not really all that strange. On the other hand, I value my privacy and don't want to upset... Continue Reading →

What do I want? What do I need?

As with many topics relating to non-monogamous relationships, this one also applies to monogamous ones. It's just that complicated relationship structures usually involve much more... of everything. More needs, more wants, and more problems arising from unmet or unidentified needs/wants. Everyone should take time to look at what they want and/or need from their relationship(s)... Continue Reading →

Don’t you ever get jealous?

When faced with the concept of consensual non-monogamy for the very first time, many people struggle to understand it. If all you've known is monogamy, talking to someone who says they don't abide by the same relationship runes as you do - the ones you assumed all the rest of the world followed too -... Continue Reading →

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