As we enter the festive season, designed to bring cheer to the dark days of winter, I thought I would share my recipe for the perfect secular Christmas. NOTE: All quantities can be adjusted to taste, and substitutions can be made wherever specific ingredients cannot be located. Enjoy! Preparation Begin the festive season by giving... Continue Reading →
Does poly have to mean ‘many’?
Once a month, for the last 15 months, I have been writing about various aspects of polyamory for a blogging project I set up called Poly Means Many. But, although poly means many, that doesn't necessarily mean that all polyamorous people have many partners. After all, if you're single, you don't stop being straight. If... Continue Reading →
Relationships, bad stuff and blame
In every relationship, much as we hate to admit it, there is bad stuff as well as good. There are times when you are feeling so sad you want to cry, so angry you want to scream, and so frustrated that you want to smash things. Whether it's an argument or a break up, bad... Continue Reading →
Relationships: Finding what’s right for you
Did you know what you wanted to be when you grew up? Most kids have an idea of what they think their grown up life would look like and usually it's all pretty straightforward, based on what they know about grown up life so far. They've seen that some adults have jobs as things like... Continue Reading →
Communication: Up front and personal
Effective communication in relationships is a tricky business. How do you know what to say and when? Is that little thing important, will they take offence and... should I just say it anyway? It can be tricky to get the right balance, but the more you talk (and listen!) the easier it becomes. However, the... Continue Reading →
Ooh, shiny! The blinding powers of NRE
Do you remember what it feels like embark on a new romantic and/or sexual relationship? That wonderfully blissful high where your new partner can do no wrong, you just can't wait to see them again, and you really don't think you could be any happier? Your heart overflows with joy and it's almost impossible to... Continue Reading →
Only monogamy equals commitment?
One of the common misconceptions about nonmonogamous (including polyamorous) folk, is that they can't commit. If they really loved someone, they'd stop all this nonsense. If we were really committed to a relationship, we simply wouldn't have others. And, of course, you can't possibly be committed to more than one person at a time, right?... Continue Reading →
Gay, straight, bi… poly?
Some people describe being poly as an orientation, whereas others feel it is simply a matter of personal choice. To be perfectly honest, when the Poly Means Many bloggers chose this topic for November's posts, I hadn't really given the idea much thought. My first instinct was that I already have an orientation and I... Continue Reading →
Thoughts on poly labels and hierarchies
When discussing polyamory with anyone - monogamous or otherwise - one of the things which often helps to explain what you mean is the use of labels. Like a verbal shorthand, labels are a great way to get your point across in fewer words... providing you are 100% sure that the person you are in... Continue Reading →
I’ve been missing you
You might think that polyamory is amazing all of the time but, sadly, you'd be wrong. As with other types of relationship, there are bad times as well as good. As far as I'm concerned, the good times more than make up for the bad, but it would be remiss of me to never mention... Continue Reading →