All Change

Settling into the single bed in my Mum’s spare bedroom on Christmas Night, was not where I thought I’d be at the beginning of 2011. Feeling like a teenager again, with my Mum excitedly coming to greet me in the mornings, and checking if I’m OK during the day. Having gone through a major relationship separation this year, including moving out and into my own place, I’ve had a year of significant change. It seems I’m not alone. Many I know have made radical decisions in 2011. Calculated, considered, but certainly reviewing what they have against what they want. The common thread that binds us is an evaluation of what we need, physically and emotionally as we move into 2012. Some have needed to go through intense pain as their relationships with themselves and others evolve.Talking to friends and colleagues, it’s clear that it isn’t an ‘age thing’, as there are a variety of ages and lifestyles involved.

I believe these shifts have come as a reaction to what’s going on around us. 2011 has been a challenging year economically, socially, politically, encouraging us to reflect on what’s important to us. To consider which relationships to let go of, and which to invest more in. What inspires us and motivates us in terms of self development? Where do we want to be socially and how do we want to spend our time? What type of working environment do we thrive from, or what sacrifices are we prepared to make to lead certain lifestyles? My evaluations and decisions have been driven by what I need and want, rather than what I feel I ‘should’ be doing. Many people I know are choosing to feel less socially constrained by imposed stereotypes and judgement, instead they are opting to make themselves happy first. And isn’t this the point? What it has taken me 33 years to realise, is that making yourself happy first means you have the motivation, energy and space to have fulfilling relationships with others. Whatever form they take.

2012 feels full of promise, of new adventures, new experiences, new friends, and of course holding those who we already have in our lives closer. One I will be embracing wholeheartedly, I deserve it!

This post was written by a RWL Guest Blogger – Melissa has a beautifully NSFW Tumblr blog and can often on be found on Twitter. In fact… that’s where she found me.

4 thoughts on “All Change

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  1. Yes 2011 has been a bit of a crappy year for lots of people – must have been something in the moon alignment! I think you are totally right about putting yourself first…I have become aware of this much more recently.

  2. Absolutely no need to be stuck in anything – miserable relationship, job or other. Its not selfish to make yourself happy first – it is selfish to rely on others to make you happy. Lovely blog post thank you! xx

  3. Ugh! I hear ya! I wasted so much time on relationships that were just really unfulfilling when I look back at them. It wasn't til I was out of them I realised how much time and emotional energy I'd been wasting. Funnily enough I was also about 33/34 when I realised that. Since then it's just been getting better and better.

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