Seeing as this week has inadvertently become more about clothes than sex – a nice contrast to last week! – it makes perfect sense for the N in my A-to-Z to be for None. Nothing. No sex at all. What if you’re not getting any? Well, guess what? It’s not necessarily a bad thing. As I wrote for BitchBuzz earlier this year, there are many reasons people go without sex, and some of them are voluntary. Perhaps you’ve decided to wait until you’re in a relationship, have chosen abstinence, have health problems, or are in a long-term relationship where relaxing cuddles seem like a far more pressing issue. Whatever the reason, if you’ve chosen to not have as much sex as society and the media say you should be having, there is no reason to feel inadequate. Are you getting enough? Surely only you can answer that.
The problem arises when you don’t want to be going without sex. When you’re not getting any and, everywhere you turn, all you can see is reminders of how much fucking everyone else is (apparently) doing. When all you can think about is your lack of a partner or that elusive orgasm. That’s when a glass of wine and a good book can be a helpful distraction, and joining a gym can refocus your brain somewhere else. Or you can just give in to the urge and sort things out yourself, but then… using your hands and toys to get yourself off isn’t really ‘no sex at all’ now, is it?
Image from Sharon Drummond‘s Flickr photostream.